We had our second homestudy meeting on Monday, and it went fine... but for some reason (maybe because we talked about my post partum breakdown in '99), i felt myself feeling a bit inadequate to adopt. Actually, i was building quite an inferiority complex during the week. After hearing (on Wednesday) that the proposed timelines have been extended, on top of everything else i was feeling, the thought crossed my mind to give up.

However, in my gloom yesterday, i prayed about it, asking God to show me something to clarify/confirm if we should continue ~ and I vaguely thought the Orphan's Hope grant would be concrete enough confirmation ~ maybe because i thought it was such a far shot ~ but what would be the likelihood of that? We had only applied in October or so, with no guarantee that we'd ever get anything.

Later that afternoon when I went to the mail, there was registered mail... from Orphan's Hope!

I don't think i can do justice trying to tell you how much this means to me! I felt such an enormous outpouring of God's love on me! I was in tears before i even opened the envelope (i did make it out of the post office and into the van though before the tears started ~ lol). It really humbled me too ~ that God would speak so clearly (with the one "confirmation" that i had considered), and with such a huge financial blessing too ~ ok, i just REALLY felt like He dumped buckets of love on me! And such patience with me!

So here's the writing on the wall for me... "God has qualified you!"